Obstacles Overcome; Lessons Learned; Now What?: Buenos Aires (YO)

My third day in BA, my host mom showed me how to get from our apartment to my host site where I take classes in a neighboring section of town. While we were walking she showed me local stores to help me familiarize the neighborhood, the major streets that everybody knows and she even drew me a map in case I forgot anything. We rode the subway for six stops and walked four blocks in order to get to my host site. On our way we passed a lot of large buildings, rush hour traffic and big groups of people all trying to get where they wanted to go. When we made it to the door she gave me a hug and a kiss and told me to be safe. I reassured her and told her I would remember everything! I said, "You don't have to worry, I won't get lost"...I hate being wrong. 

Typical BA apartment

About 8 hours after class and walking to the famous Recoleta Cemetery with some friends which was about 4 miles away from the host site, I decided it was time to go home. Almost all the streets in Buenos Aires are a straight line so I figured there was no way for me to get lost. Well after about 30 minutes I didn't know where I was and I spent another 15 minutes retracing my steps until I finally found the subway station. Unfortunately, the specific line I use was closed because of a protest that was going on. Protests and marches are very common and sometimes unpredictable in the city. However, with this being only my third day in BA I had no clue of what to do in case one were to happen. By this time my host site was closed and I had no way of getting in touch with my host mom. So I decided to sit in a restaurant until I figured out a way to get home. I walked into this large place called La Opera. It sat on the corner of two busy streets called Callao and Corrientes. It was very nice with its white table clothes and high ceilings but comfortable due to its open space and kind staff. While sitting down, it was clear on my face that something was wrong. I was trying hard to keep calm but once I realized there was no bus either that would take me anywhere near my house, I started to worry. By this time I wasn't in the mood to eat anything. All the same I figured it was best that I ordered something since I was going to be sitting there for a while. One of the waiters came over to me and I faintly asked for the rice and tuna.

While I was waiting on the food, I was debating whether or not to ask for help in order to get back home. I know it sounds weird. If you're stranded in the middle of a new city why wouldn't you ask for help? To be honest, I felt scared being at the mercy of other people. I viewed my attributes of being a student from the States, having limited knowledge of the language, being alone and being a woman as too many things that people could take advantage of, all the while being in a different country that I only knew a handful of things about. Ultimately, I believed that if I kept everything bottled up and to myself I would be safer that way. Then as the sun started going down I realized that notion wasn't going to help me either. When the waiter came back with my food I decided to ask him for help. He ended up chatting with me for at least ten minutes, asking me where I was from, what languages I knew. We would go back and forth with him trying to ask things in English and me trying to respond in Spanish. We both laughed at ourselves with neither one of us being masters in each other's native languages. Finally when he asked how long I had been in Buenos Aires and I told him three days, he quickly realized why I needed so much help and was more than happy to oblige. He told me to take any available radio (commercial) taxi on the street (big difference between radio taxis and regular taxis, in short radio taxis are safer - especially for women/especially at night). He said that all of them know the city like the back of their hand and they would take me wherever I needed to go. Would you believe that I still go to that same restaurant, talk to that same waiter and without fail order the same rice and tuna?

BA food is phenomenal but I'd do anything to take its snacks back to the States

This is just one of many good experiences that I've had with the people here. Of course there have been bad ones too but looking back now, it seems as though whenever I needed to be proven wrong about the kindness and understanding of others, specific instances would always present themselves. People everywhere from program coordinators and students at the local university to my host mom and even my friend's Argentine boyfriend, all helped me with problems that I never thought I'd have and taught me things I didn't know I needed to learn.

I have gained a lot of useful skills here such as action planning, interpersonal sensitivity, deep cultural competence and high language proficiency. All of these look good on a résumé but what I gained more importantly are the abilities of being able to rely on other people, asking for help when I need it, not being ashamed of my mistakes, and most importantly not being afraid to embrace love in whatever form it presents itself. Gaining these abilities have been the most difficult and challenging thing I've done while away. I know it may sound like a cliché but it's the truth. The reason I came to Argentina was to become fluent in Spanish, learn about another culture firsthand and fulfill the need I had of proving something to myself. I'm not really sure how to put what that something was into words. Yet overall I know it was about overcoming my fears, insecurities, and doing something crazy like living in another country for almost half a year in order to see that I really could do whatever I set my mind to.

Countryside of Argentina

Saying all this now I realize that this experience in Argentina was just another chapter in my life. It was never about exocitizing a new place or going on a journey of self-revelation as so many people make study abroad out to be. Even though I have changed in some ways, I am still the same in a lot of other ways too. I am still an impatient driver, a perfectionist, the loudest one to laugh in my group of friends and the person you'll catch awake at 4am working somewhere on campus because procrastination is an art that I have mastered. The truth is, is that as people we change all the time. We all go through things that change us and we have to learn about the new person we've become. That's the very nature of life, to have subtle waves of stability along with the ever present undercurrent of change. I could have been anywhere in the world, even home, either way the experiences that I had here needed to happen in order for me to take the next step in my life. Yet as fate would have it they were meant to happen here at this time in my life for a reason. Of course I don't know what that reason is yet, life wouldn't be life if we always knew what was around the corner. Regardless, I feel so accomplished not only because of the goals that I've reached but also because I've learned how to embrace all the things that really do matter to me, how to not worry about things that are trivial or the things that I simply cannot change.                                                                             

Art here is famous for capturing significant moments in history & life 

Going back home in a month and a half seems almost surreal now. Mostly because I still remember all the thoughts and emotions from when I first arrived. Now everything here is so familiar to me, it feels as if I'm caught between the past, present and future. In spite of this, I don't think I have to worry about home feeling unfamiliar when I finally do go back. Everyday here I thought about all the people that I love, how they're doing, what they're up to and if they missed me as much as I missed them. This really hit me when the graduation of my brother and so many of my friends came rolling around and I wasn't there for any of them. On the one hand I was so elated for them that I wanted to cry. On the other hand I was humbled because I saw the people that I love living their lives and all I wanted to do was be there and share in those special moments with them. I use to think that your real home couldn't be more than one place but during that graduation weekend I knew that it didn't matter to me where I was. If I was around the people that I love then I was already home. All of this reflection is sort of eerie though. I remember my grandma saying that there are so many things the dead would tell the living if they could. I was very young so of course I didn't understand why she would say that. Yet now all these things that I'm sharing in a blog post for my college are helping me to genuinely appreciate everything I've learned. As I said before, I'm not sure why I needed to learn these lessons at this exact time in my life. However, coming from my grandma's perspective I think it was time for me to overcome myself as my biggest obstacle. I think it was due time that I started living my life without so much doubt in myself and in other people. A big part of me needed myself to just start living and to not be so afraid to live. 

My friend and me at the famous BA neighborhood of Boca

With that being said, I've shared one of the poems I've written during my time away. I use to write all the time and have been meaning to get back to it for some time, now I finally have. I hope you enjoy.