For this blog post,
I condensed several different conversations that I had with my host
mother over dinner. She has been a wonderful resource for me, from
helping me learn the French language to sharing her own life
experiences to aid my understanding of the French culture. I have
reflected back on a few conversations and experiences I have had with
her since arriving in France, and I think that the topics I address
in this blog post are interesting.
The first thing I
want to talk about is the very different ways that the French and
Americans view marriage. My older sister is getting married this
year, and even though I am halfway across the world, I am still
helping her plan it via email. While it is getting increasingly more
common for young American couples to live together and have children
without being married, there is still a bit of a taboo on it. It is
also just recently that having children out of wedlock has become
socially acceptable in the United States, and it also depends on
where you live. After speaking with my host mother in France, I
realized that most French people have the opposite view. My host
mother told me that she has never been married, but she has two adult
children. In France, she said it is almost more common for people to
remain unmarried even if they are raising children. It is simply
part of life here in France, and aside from a few very religious or
very traditional people, it is not even something that crosses the
minds of most people. I am used to articles and news stories in the
United States that discuss high divorce rates, the plight of the
single mother, and just the general instability that comes with
raising a family without the bonds of marriage. I personally come
from a family where my parents have been married for nearly thirty
years, and I grew up in a town where most of my friends' parents were
either married or had been married at one point. I just found it
incredibly interesting that, for two countries that are so similar as
far as standards of living and most other factors of day to day life,
that something so ingrained in tradition like marriage would be so
different. Before speaking to my host mother, I never gave it much
thought, but now I realize that something that is barely discussed in
France is almost always a topic of conversation in the United States
when one is talking about relationships or family.
My host mother and I
also have what would roughly translate to “tea time” in English
every Sunday afternoon. It is just an informal bonding time where we
talk or watch a bit of television and share a snack and some tea to
unwind after a long week. At first I thought my host mother just did
this so we would have time to spend together when we were both free,
but I learned last week that most of France shuts down on Sundays. I
remember mentioning that I was planning to go grocery shopping on a
Sunday, and my host mother told me that nothing is open after noon on
Sundays. Most of the bus lines in town do not even run because in
France, Sunday is simply a day to relax and none of the shop workers
want to work on Sundays. In the United States, especially being a
student, I'm used
to the weekend being a time to play catch-up. I
may have a few hours to relax here and there, but I spend a majority
of my weekend doing schoolwork that I didn't have time to finish
during the week or running errands that I didn't have time to do
during the week because I was too busy with classes. I think that
Americans could definitely learn something from the French. While it
is a bit inconvenient that you can't even run out for milk or bread
on a Sunday, it is refreshing to be able to spend an entire day
relaxing at home. Its also a guilt-free time because there is nothing
else that you could possibly be doing if nothing is open. I feel
like a lot of people in the United States spend their entire weekends
rushing around and they don't take enough time to relax and just
spend time with their family or friends. If I take home one tradition
with me from my time spend abroad, I will definitely try to make more
time on the weekends to just recharge and reconnect with the people I
care about instead of rushing around trying to catch up on work or
chores.
No comments:
Post a Comment